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A new, free Radiohead album next week? The world must becoming to an end

I know this may be a little late, but I just couldn't bear to not see anything on the blog about this monumental occasion.

Radiohead may have just pulled off the biggest coup in music history. They're about to simultaneously steal the hope Diamond, re-sink the Titanic and end global poverty...forget it, I can't even sum it up in one sentence.

How? Well, first off--the band haven't given us an album since 2003's lackluster "Hail to the Thief" (unless you count Thom Yorke's boring solo album "The Eraser"--I, of course, don't)...and they told us that we wouldn't be getting one until at least 2008...letting us all down for a 4th straight year.

That announcement was particularly depressing when the band had a blog about their recording sessions and after Jonny Greenwood (the world's greatest guitar player) told Pitchforkmedia that the band was "done recording".


Damn you, damn you to hell...right?


Wrong.


What does it mean? Well, an $81 package that includes 2 vinyl lp, 2 cds and a hardcover book and/or a digital download on October 10th. Yes, September 10th--seven days from now. The band announced the album, "In Rainbows" on September 30th and are releasing it on October 10. That may be the fastest turnaround for any major-label band ever.

Hold up, though--Radiohead are no longer a major label band--the band doesn't even have a record label anymore. "Hail to the Thief" fulfilled their obligation to Capitol/Parlophone--and you can be damn sure that no money-making label would want to be anywhere near Radiohead at this second.

Why? No, it's not because of the music (I've only heard a few of the songs--"Nude" has been a fan favorite since forever and is the song that almost caused the band to break up on the 1997 documentary "Meeting People is Easy"...and "Reckoner" was a terrible song played live on the "Amnesiac" tour)--it's because they, in theory, are giving the album away for free. Yes, for free. You decide how much you want to pay for the record on the band's official site--and you are promised the download of the album on October 10. As much as it pains me to admit this, I decided to pay $0.00 for the album (I will probably buy the $81 pack in December, because they won't even begin shipping until December). I had to wait in an online queue (oh you charming British lads), but I was given a receipt and told I could download the album on October 10th.

O rly?

srsly?

Really.

We all know that Radiohead are probably the most influential modern band (finding a band with a singer that doesn't sound like Thom Yorke these days is the exception, not the rule) and that this album, in all honesty, is going to bring the rock...and the glitch...and the noise....and the ethereal...and the downright awesome. And, best of all, we can all have it for free (legally). You'd think there was a catch, but, no, not this time. It'd be one thing if Muse gave away their album free (*barfs*)...but Radiohead? Not to be cheesy/punny, but the boys must be paying off the Karma Police or something (*crickets*).

Anyway, here's the tracklist for the RH nerds out there ("Bodysnatchers" sees Jonny bringing the Telecaster funk from the live bootlegs I've heard...and it seems that they've relegated a good deal of the songs that they were playing on their last European tour onto the exclusive, $81 disc...so at least we know we're getting a load of fresh songs for free):

Disc 1

1. "15 Step"
2. "Bodysnatchers"
3. "Nude"
4. "Weird Fishes/Arpeggi"
5. "All I Need"
6. "Faust ARP"
7. "Reckoner"
8. "House of Cards"
9. "Jigsaw Falling into Place"
10. "Videotape"

Disc 2

1. "MK1"
2. "Down Is the New Up"
3. "Go Slowly"
4. "MK2"
5. "Last Flowers"
6. "Up on the Ladder"
7. "Bangers and Mash"
8. "4 Minute Warning"

Wasn't it Thom who sang "No alarms and no surprises, please?" Gah. Alright, really. You know to call it a day when you're expressing your emotions with Radiohead song quotes.